I’ve had a while now to decompress from the North Korea adventure, here are some short notes and thoughts on the trip into the most reclusive nation on Earth…

• We knew we’d have two guides, but were told it’d be one male and one female. We got two female guides – a 23 year old “new” guide and a 26 year old “experienced” guide. This immediately has us form an unspoken game plan for our time in country.
• I immediately started playing up how interested I am in things, how I love giant tall things, how I want to go to the top, how I am animated and fun loving and goofy and a silly American and smiling and love learning facts and tell me how tall this thing is wow that is SO TALL thank you for sharing, while my wife played the quiet one. We both did this independently and never stated it until we were leaving or really planned it ahead of time, but we both did it while there.
• The young guide had a crush on me and wanted to impress me. I wanted her to not get upset and have the secret police throw me in a work camp.
• The entire time you are there you are on edge. Adrenaline is pumping, you have to always think on your feet, they are constantly asking you questions and since you’re American, they are trying to get you to slip up. And they know certain things about America, like #BlackLivesMatter and #TrevonMartin and the Trail of Tears for the Native Americans. It’s like a never-ending game of mental chess, where the stakes are: win and you get your passport back and can leave, lose and, well, I didn’t want to lose.
• The young guide went to ping-pong school for a month. We played ping pong on the final night with another American, and every time our guide made a mistake, she had a twitch. I do not want to know what happened when she messed up in ping pong class that had her develop a twitch.
• The guide liked me so much she got the itinerary changed so we could go to the Fun Fair the final night and ride the amusement park rides. I was excited, until I realized I did not want to die riding a North Korean amusement park ride. We did not go to the Fun Fair.
• We had to lay flowers, respectfully, and then bow, at the Dear Leader statue. It was only a suggestion “if we wanted to be respectful”, and by all means I wanted to be viewed as respectful.
• Everything in the city is “the”. “The library”. “The roller skate rink”. “The bowling alley”. There are two tourist hotels. “The new street”. “The theatre”. “The Square”.
• Electricity is not plentiful for the citizens. The city is creepy dark at night. I feel bad for the people there.
• The questioning by the guard at the DMZ was awful, and it was mentally taxing. And then he petted my beard and smiled.
• The power went out at dinner. We sat in silence, in the dark, for 90 seconds. A loud generator kicked on, emergency lights came on, and the guides started laughing and talking again like nothing happened.
• We went to the Children’s Palace. Like a creepy tower of horrors. Those kids…they all performed different skills for us in different rooms. Just…*shudder*
• US Imperialists.
• I cannot figure out if our guides drank the kool-aid and believe the wonders, or if they say it knowing that their job allows them steady “good” food and access to things most citizens don’t have.
• The weirdest feeling was getting my passport back, and getting an airplane ticket, and leaving, while the guides and everyone else I encountered are not legally allowed to purchase an airplane ticket and leave. I went to the Great Wall and saw pandas, and they will never be allowed to do that while their government exists. But they acted like it was normal.  Strange.

And now, some North Korea photos…

And a map of where in North Korea we went…